discovering an innate subconscious emotive reaction to how I respond in different arenas.. that when I’m among peers who have some shared experiences, when I’m among friends, when I’m with people who talk above my head, when I’m doing a presentation in a mixed audience, when I’m in a formal meeting, or when I’m teaching/ presenting with people who don’t know what I know, I feel very differently in each. And much of that is perhaps normal, what happens with those feelings is that they feel somewhat overpowering or overwhelming, (in the more formal situations, that is), so I get tunnel-visioned, mouth-goes-dry, and I babble through what I have to say.. whereas in other situations, I feel lucid and my thoughts are coherent, perhaps even persuasive. Not sure how much of this can be disciplined, in terms of managing my emotions.. all this to say, I’m part of the human drama. The lingering reflection is: what does this mean for me as an ePastor, does it say that I oughta hide my doubts and fears and quirks, and be preachy all the time, spout Bible verses, and be spiritual and stuff? I’m not so persuaded….